Mothers understanding the term “nesting” intuitively. For years, I have watched my friends preparing nurseries for their babies prior to delivery and have heard countless stories of mothers-to-be scrubbing toilets and tops of refrigerators in the middle of the night, frantically trying to clean invisible messes. I’ve seen many pictures of nurseries and have observed the trends of bird and owl decor, stencilled phrases and verses on the walls, and Chevron fabric, all of which will go out of style within a few years.
I have, in moments, joined the ranks of the baseboard scrubbers.
At 26 weeks, I feel that my daughter is constantly kicking me to remind me to get ready for her arrival. My body’s enormity won’t let me forget it. However, since we’re in the middle of home additions and renovations, the real nesting cannot begin yet. The nursery is currently our office and baby storage area. Baby clothes, hand-sewn decorations, and unassembled shelves wait patiently along the wall.
I fight the urge to throw everything non-baby related into the living room and start laying out the nursery every day. In some ways, the waiting drives me nuts. In other ways, it’s a gift.
Since I can’t constantly work on the nursery, I’ve relegated my energy to other tasks. I’ve been able to get other rooms more organized and assist in small ways in the renovation projects. I’ve had time to do homework and write papers for my classes in graduate school and immerse myself in reading excellent novels. I’ve said yes to lunch invitations, sewing dates, and fishing trips.. I’ve even managed to enjoy countless hours of the 2012 Olympic games.
Perhaps this is one of the many times in my life when God knows me better than I know myself. In order to prevent me from obsessing about tiny details of the nursery and from overwhelming myself with pregnancy worries, He has imposed a different timetable than the one I would have preferred. He has forced me to slow down. He has blessed me with a “very active baby,” according to multiple nurses and doctors. Because I cannot constantly create projects for myself, I’m able to feel our very active baby moving and to cherish the undistracted time I have with her father right now. I can wake up in the morning, watch the sun rise through the trees outside my window, and start the day with prayer and Scripture.
I’m nesting in my soul rather than on shelves or in closets, creating a spiritual home that will never go out of style.